so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize