this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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