Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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