so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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