Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
