you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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