so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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