smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
my sisters under your porch take her home
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
