Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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