no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
there was a trapeze. enough said
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Randomize
