I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
If I die, sorry about rent.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
