I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
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