I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
