I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
