what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
