haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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