glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
