Whats the glycemic index on semen?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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