this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
