question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
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I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
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His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize