Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Randomize
