I'm drive I can fine osifer
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
