is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
