whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
where are my eyebrows?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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