Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
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Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
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We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?