i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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