I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
