another moral hangover. fuck.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
