Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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