New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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