So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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