okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
