Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
