You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
