You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
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I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
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eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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