it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
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