which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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