Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
