i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
