I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Randomize
