Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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