You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
