this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
