So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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