That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
