like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize