dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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