fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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