i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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