u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
should my penis look like a turkey
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
so much tequila, so little girl.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
